I miss my past

Thousands thing that i miss so much.... as my life today does not look like a life actually, always tired, always busy, always tired... so sometimes i just sat and think about what i really miss doing in my past...


I really miss going out with Pika to Casa Raya and eat our dinner there while watching the television or just talk on whatever we want to talk about, mostly we talk about whatever we did that day. Update ourselves on each other. Miss that.

I really miss going out with Pika every weekend from morning until night, spending our time in shopping mall, window shopping as we did not have money during that day. To think about it, i have money now, but i don't know how to spend it. Because everyday, i just work and if i had a day off i just sleep, eat and window shopping again because i don't know what to buy when i am alone.

I really miss going out with Pika watching movie. Almost every movie in the cinema we watched every week.

I really miss doing my 4th year medical study in the same group with Pika. We went to Papar for district posting together, to Kudat for community posting, to Bukit Padang for psychiatry posting, for that year, i was having the best year in my life.

I really miss going holiday with my family. Last convocation holiday did not count as it end up by the rest of us having gastroenteritis. I miss the time when I finish my posting in medical school (like 2 months for every posting) then my family went to KK to fetch me home to Labuan. In KK we will had our kind of holiday, shopping and everything.

I really miss going to our Banana orchard in Labuan. At 4 PM, after a day just sitting in front of the TV, my dad and my sister will be back from work and all of us will go outside to the orchard and either clean it or i just go around playing with my cat..... i really miss my cats, yet i met them during convocation week but i miss to go outside and play with them, not just meet them in the hotel room.

I really miss spending my Raya with my family when there is nothing else to think about. not like spending Raya but still thinking about exam or whatever. I miss the time when i don't have anything to think about, just spending Raya as it is. So nice.

I really miss going online with Pika in the middle of the night, in library or School of Psychology which provide 24 hours internet access to student.

I really miss trying all kind of places to eat with Pika. As almost every place in KK we have tried.


If i keep writing, there will be a thousands thing that i miss. But what to do. Now i am working, i don't know what they used to say when i was in medical school, they said that when i became a doctor, i will have resposibility. To think about it now, am i tired because of that responsibility?


I am tired because of the system..... is there any occupation that required you to work until 36 hours non stop, and work from 6.30am to 8 pm everyday... bussinessman does that..they said....but if i were a businessman... sure i can take a day or two off to rest my brain, but my work.... a day off means you are going to work double hard tomorrow.